Sunday afternoon the Kansas City Chiefs handed over the Los Angeles Chargers a 17-10 loss in the NFL’s 4. Here’s some of what Tom Ruprecht heard at So-Fi Stadium in Inglewood, California.

1. “With a price tag of $5.5 billion, So-Fi Stadium has everything…I mean, other than Chargers fans.”
2. “Carson, if your sister got some nice china for her wedding present, I recommend it not to deal with.”
3. “If I find the jerk who destroyed Rashee Rice’s knee, I’m going to… oh, never mind.”
4. “Quick! Call Roger Goddell! Tell him Rashee Rice wants to serve his suspension right now!”
5. “Didn’t the Chiefs rest Skyy Moore to keep him fresh for the playoffs?”
6. “It appears the plan for Rashee Rice’s replacement is for Chris Jones to move into playoff mode.”
7. “Isn’t it wonderful? We get a day where we can truly appreciate the Chiefs’ premier punter!”
8. “If Justin Herbert is so immobile, why can’t Tershawn Wharton catch him?”
9. “The only one who can beat the Chiefs is the Chiefs… especially Jawaan Taylor.”
10. “If you’re really depressed, Xavier Worthy works better than Prozac!”